no matter how

No matter how much I want to be good I have to be bad
No matter how much I want to stay sane I have to go mad
No matter how much I want to tell the truth I know I have to lie
No matter how much I want to stay alive one day I have to die

Sorry if I depress ya
Sorry if I annoy ya
With all this talk of death despair
Pain and paranoia

But when reality
Gets the better of me
Darkness is all that I can see

No matter how loud I’m screamin
I can’t shout down these demons in my soul
They’re out of control
Demons in my soul

No matter how much I want to be normal I have to be odd
No matter how much I’d rather play human I have to play God
No matter how hard I try to save money I always lose interest
No matter how much I want to stay faithful I must have a mistress

Sorry if I offend ya
Sorry I have to warn ya
About all this talk of sex evil
Hate and California

But then reality
Gets the better of me
With darkness as far as I can see

No matter how loud I’m screamin
I can’t shout down these demons in my soul
They’re out of control
Demons in my soul

Sometimes I feel like I’m caught like a deer in the headlights
As I’m choosing a road I can follow
But if I were to do what I thought right
Would I choke on the pride I must swallow?

Demons in my soul


© JL Pagano 1997

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