What once was "All Smoke And Mirrors" is now...

Showing newest 18 of 23 posts from July 2007. Show older posts
Showing newest 18 of 23 posts from July 2007. Show older posts

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

g.i. jesus



This was on the Christian Today website, which as you all know I never let a day pass without downloading…

Wal-Mart, the world’s largest corporation, has jumped on the faith-based bandwagon with representatives announcing Tuesday that they will begin to test-sell biblical action figures in their stores.

About one-eighth of the company’s discount stores – 425 out of a possible 3,376 – will now devote part of their toy aisle to One2believe, a Valencia, California-based company that creates action figures based on biblical heroes such as Samson.

The announcement is part of a larger trend among big companies towards investing into more religious and family-friendly products. Business leaders are beginning to see that they can make large profits from a majority of the population who have religious beliefs.

You know what, I really, really tried to find a way to be annoyed about this, but I just couldn’t do it. I really hope I haven’t alienated the entire Liberal Brotherhood!!!!

See the thing is, just because the Religious Right tend to position themselves in such a way that make me want to punch my bare fist into a brick wall, that doesn’t mean that I have to automatically object to everything they do.

How could I possibly be offended by a religious toy? How could it possibly be any worse than a Bratz doll or an Action Man? And it’s not as though these toys are being handed out in classrooms. I’m all for free speech, and if a business wants to market these products, then they should be allowed to do so.

In fact, why stop there? How about a series of action Power-Ranger-type figurines, with Jesus, Mohammed, Buddha etc all getting their own dolls? Maybe educate our children about all the different religions of the world??? Ah...THERE’S my left wing principles, exactly where I left ‘em!!! I knew they wouldn’t stray too far away!!!

Monday, July 30, 2007

first impressions...



I'm too tired lazy to do bitesize bullets this week. I have a feeling y'all will be ok with that. Instead I'll play with my photoshop a bit. Today's pics from Camp David were all simply SCREAMING for captions...

Sunday, July 29, 2007

jl's sports shorts


Weekends can't be for blogging about current affairs or anything like that – it’s a time to write about the stuff that REALLY matters!


DRAW YOUR OWN CONCLUSIONS

Sun July 29 : All Ireland Hurling Quarterfinal

Waterford 3-16 Cork 3-16


Now I like to think I’m an open-minded type of person, so I am going to remain calm as I ask this question. I have a plea to GAA fans, particularly those from Waterford and Cork. Can you please, PLEASE explain to me how you could possibly be happy with the outcome of Sunday’s farce in Croke Park??? I watched in disbelief as a melee around the Cork net which was totally six of one half a dozen the other somehow resulted in a free-in which Waterford easily executed and hey, presto, the referee suddenly decided it was time to blow the full-time whistle which means the fans have to shell out on another set of tickets next week. PLEASE someone explain to me how it’s ok for this to happen. I really want to understand. Is there absolutely no way Sunday’s match could have at least gone on for another ten minutes to find a winner? Is that impossible? Is there something about GAA players which means they can’t play beyond 70 minutes? Do GAA fans have endlessly deep pockets and is their devotion to their sport such that they are happy to come back and watch another game? I really am curious to know the answer to this. Could it be that today’s referee really wasn’t swayed by his employers in awarding the free-in to Waterford? Am I being too much of a conspiracy theorist? Am I totally missing the true competitive amateur spirit of the GAA and are they totally uninterested in manipulating the structure of their competitions so they can generate their own revenue??? Somebody please set me straight!!!! Picture courtesy of http://www.rte.ie/ and photoshop

TO DARREN IS TO DO

Sat July 28 : Vodacom Challenge Pre-Season Tournament

Orlando Pirates-0 Tottenham Hotspur-3


Talk about an embarrassment of riches up front!!! Having scored 63 goals between them last term, Berbatov, Keane and Defoe hardly had much to prove in pre-season, and thus the onus was on new boy Darren Bent to show he could persuade the media to hail them as the Fantastic Four. Surely it’s only a matter of time before that nickname is on everyone’s lips regarding these guys! Bent had the Orlando Pirates buried like a chest full of gold doubloons midway through the first half. Having smashed one in from the edge of the box and shown gritty determination to pinch a ball the centre half was letting run out of play to then set up Berbatov, the £16million signing from Charlton saved his best till last. After a neat build up from Huddlestone and Tarrabt, a deft body swerve gave Darren the space to coolly tuck away Spurs’ third and ensure my boys would be the first team ever to take this pre-season trophy out of South Africa. I suppose the only other thing I would be looking for in the performance was our ability to keep a clean sheet, which clearly was the difference between a good season and a great one for us last term. Sadly, although there were some impressive displays from the likes of Malbranque and Rocha on the defensive side, the South African outfit, who are supposed to be the local answer to Manchester United in terms of success and crowd support, were clearly on an off-day and rarely threatened Paul Robinson’s goal. And so Martin Jol can reflect on a pre-season campaign which has yielded five wins out of five so far. All that remains before the Premiership opener at the Stadium of Light in two weeks are two very contrasting friendlies against Leyton Orient and Torino respectively. I guess the biggest thing I got from watching this match was a sense of how much I’m looking forward to the new season. Pic of Darren Bent (#23) setting up Berbatov (out of shot) for Spurs’ second goal courtesy of www.tottenhamhotspur.com

RUGBY WORLD CUP – THE FINE PRINT

I don’t think it will take the mysterious death of a coach to make this September’s Rugby World Cup more exciting than its cricket equivalent last spring. Even though Ireland are in a “group of death” with two other established nations where only two progress to the next round, with a fit squad surely by now we can feel confident enough to progress. But I will talk more about the actual fixtures when we get closer to the event. Now I’d like to explore the nerdy-yet-important-to-know issues. I remember when France played Scotland in the Six Nations last March and I was in a pub full of screaming Ireland supporters. Unfortunately, I seemed to be the only one around who knew exactly how the Championship was awarded. Every time there was another score, half a dozen people turned to me and asked…"What does this mean NOW?" So if you are at all interested in Ireland’s participation in the World Cup, here’s a few facts you need to remember. First, the overall format of the competition. There are twenty nations taking part, and they have been divided into four pools of five teams. Everyone plays everyone else in their pool once, and that makes for four matches. Ireland’s campaign kicks off September 9 against Namibia in Bordeaux, followed by Georgia six days later at the same venue. On the 21st they take on the mighty French, and finally they have what should be the pivotal game with Argentina on the 30th. To rank the teams within a pool, the “Super 12” scoring system is used. You get 4 points for a win, 2 for a draw and 0 for a loss. You score a bonus point if you score at least four tries OR if you lose by seven points or less. If teams are level on points at the end of the pool phase, the first thing that separates them is the result of the pool match between them. Next in line is points differential, then try scoring differential, then total points scored. This may all seem academic now, but mark my words you may find yourself scratching your head in a pub in September! And so the five teams are ranked in their pool and the top 2 advance to the quarter-finals. From here on in, it’s a straight knockout format, and the only way things get tricky is if a game ends in a draw. First, they play an extra ten minutes. If they’re still level, they play another 10 minutes, but this time it’s “sudden death”. If that still doesn’t separate them, we then go into rugby’s answer to a penalty shoot-out, ie a “kicking competition”. Five players from each side take turns trying to kick the ball over the posts from different areas of the ground. If they are still level after five, then it’s sudden death. Imagine the tension if an Irish quarterfinal came down to that!!! Anyway, here is a link to the rules if you want to cross more t’s and dot more i’s, but I think I’ve given you all you need to know. Feel free to bookmark this post if you have questions when the tournament comes around. Hopefully the information will end up being a bit like the Irish language – good to know, but ultimately useless. Pic of the competition logo courtesy of http://www.wru.co.uk/


STUCK IN NEUTRAL

Wed July 25 : Champions League 1st Qualifying Round 2nd Leg

FC Pyunik-2 Derry City-0 (agg 2-0)


Wednesday’s result in Armenia perfectly encapsulates for me the current state of domestic football in Ireland. Never mind the fact that our team was eliminated at the first hurdle – that’s the least of our problems. Here we are at the halfway stage of our season. One of the reasons we switched to summer football in the first place was so that our clubs were better prepared for European football which would begin towards the end of July. That made a lot of sense to me at the time. But what would you think should be the best preparation for Europe? Competitive league matches, right? Wrong!!! Now here in the Emerald Isle we are in full-blown silly season, when not only do the Euro ties come around, we also have the phenomenon of the friendlies with English clubs. Our cross-channel contemporaries get to hand pick the day and time of their arrival, they play a match that doesn’t really matter, and subsequently throw our fixture schedule into chaos. For a perfect case in point, my UCD had an excellent last-minute 1-0 victory over Bohemians in the Premier Division on Friday night at Belfield Park, but surely the visitor's minds were more focused on their lucrative friendly against Roy Keane's Sunderland the following night. And what's more, I seriously believe that if Manchester United had asked Derry City to play a friendly at the Brandywell last Wednesday evening, the Foylesiders would have sent their Under-19 team to Armenia. Now I fully understand that clubs want to make money. What I don’t understand is why isn’t the FAI doing more to ensure that they make money from its domestic competitions. The way things are now the calendar is guaranteed to be chaotic before the season even starts. How would I take care of this? First, I would designate specific dates when pre-season friendlies could be played, even if this means freeing up a league weekend for them. If you can't play on those dates, then tough titty! Maybe if we treated our own league with respect, the English clubs might do the same and be a bit more adaptable. Second, I might move the Setanta Cup in the schedule to midweek dates in June and early July. This should benefit teams on both sides of the border as it would ensure clubs with a European campaign ahead of them were facing each other right before the matches came around. Allowances could be made for the northern clubs but surely they would be back early for training anyway. Anyway…apart from the calendar issues, I find it amazing that in this day and age I can’t find one single picture online from last Wednesdasy’s game in Armenia. It also has to be noted that the team representing us in the Champions League weren’t even our real champions!!! To paraphrase one Mr Dunphy – our game is in a shambles!!! And don’t let a night at Richmond Park watching Robbie Keane go through the motions tell you otherwise!!! Pic of the Champions League logo courtesy of www.mtcw.de

Friday, July 27, 2007

a-roma-therapy


I’m actually getting to a stage where I can listen to an average bigot without losing all sense of reason myself in the process.

When news came over the airwaves that some Roma gypsies were camped beside the M50, you could pretty much write the views of several people before you heard a single opinion expressed.

I mean – surely these people have to be the worst possible kind of immigrants from a bigot’s standpoint. Not only did they have the nerve to come here from another country, but they’re also travellers into the bargain!!!

So when public opinion leans towards their being put on a plane and sent back from whence they came, I suppose you can’t be all that surprised. And as for organisations like Pavee Point, you have to expect that they are going to be hailed as “do-gooders”, which somehow is a bad thing according to some people. The bare-faced cheek some people have for doing good!!!

Now – where the bigotry starts to get a little bit ridiculous is when I hear people complain about the tax-payers footing the bill for sending people home. They’re the ones I want to yell at.

Just so these people know…this country HAS to make it relatively easy for people to come here, mostly because we rely so much on the tourism industry. If we treated every visitor as a potential “sponger”, we’d lose a huge chunk of our revenue, and of course, that includes taxes.

So I reckon it’s worth a few bob to repatriate people like the Roma. I mean, what exactly are you complaining about? Surely sending these people home can only serve as an example that our system is working!

They came here, they expected to automatically receive services they were never entitled to receive, they were sent home. From what I can make out, all the “do-gooder” organisations were trying to do in the meantime was ensure they were staying in humane conditions while they were here.

In my opinion, this underbelly of racist bullshit that rears its ugly head whenever a story like this comes to light is a result of frustration from Irish people who haven’t gotten the slice of the Celtic Tiger they automatically felt THEY were entitled to. Immigrants become an easy target to the likes of them.

Personally, I very much doubt the proportion of criminals among the people coming into this country is that much greater than that of those living here already. And, of course, most of you out there agree with me – it’s just a shame that such a minority opinion has to rise to the surface when we hear these stories.

Thursday, July 26, 2007

what are the odds?


Yet another rollover!!! Could be €15million next weekend!!! Sure, that’s nothing compared to other lotteries but it’s still goddam good!!!

What is it about numbers that strikes fear into the hearts of people? I want to discuss the actual odds of winning the Irish lottery in this post, yet I have a feeling the sight of a series of digits separated by symbols might scare readers into clicking the “next blog” button. I guess all I can do is press on and hope my “fraidy-cat” gibe will coax people to take in all I have to say.

Not long ago, the Lotto draw was based on your picking six numbers from 42, and if yours matched those brought out by the actual draw, you win the jackpot.

Right…imagine the first ball is drawn. There is a 1 in 42 chance that it will match the one you picked, right? OK. When the second ball is drawn, there are only 41 balls left, so now it’s a 1 in 41 chance. For the two balls to match what you have, you have to multiply 42 by 41 to see the odds. And so we go on throughout the draw, when there are 40, 39, 38 and 37 balls left respectively.

And so, to work out the odds of your six numbers matching the draw’s, you have to multiply 42 x 41 x 40 x 39 x 38 x 37. That works out as 3,776,965,920. In other words, just under 3.8 billion to one.

So, what happened when they added three more numbers to the draw??? Does that mean we have a greater chance of winning? Let’s see.

Now we have to multiply 45 x 44 x 43 x 42 x 41 x 40. That works out as 5,864,443,200. In other words, just under 5.9 billion to one. In other words, over 1.5 times of the odds when there were 42 numbers.

I bought 5 lines in Wednesday’s draw, with “Lotto plus”. They cost me €10, so obviously it was €2 per line. Since this jackpot was around €13million, the actual odds I was being offered to win the jackpot were 7,500,000 to one. That’s assuming, of course, that noone else picks the same numbers.

So let’s see…if my calculations are correct (and they may very well not be because I’m a bit scared of numbers myself) then the real odds of winning it all are at least 781 times greater than the actual odds offered by the prize.

What that say about us? Why make the top jackpot so ridiculously big? Why not divert more money to the smaller prizes so that more people can win something? Would you be on for knocking, say, a million off the jackpot if you knew it meant 100 more people would win €10,000? I sure wouldn’t say no to ten grand!!!

We really are greedy bastards, aren’t we? Well just don’t cut ahead of me in the queue when I’m buying my ticket for Saturday’s draw, ok? Things could get nasty, and I’m a pretty big guy.

CORRECTION - Sunday July 27

OK, I made a pig's ear of my figures, but at least I'm man enough to admit it. Seemingly the fact that it doesn't matter what order your numbers are in reduces the odds considerably. The billion numbers I have above apparently have to be divided by 1 x 2 x 3 x 4 x 5 x 6 to give the correct odds. And so, the REAL odds of winning the overall jackpot in a 45-number draw are 8,145,060 to 1. I should have known that really. I guess what I have proven here is just how ashamed people are to admit they're good at numbers. This post has attracted quite few hits and not one person has chosen to correct me.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

backtracking

If ever there was a bizarre day in my life that warranted a post on my blog, it was the day of my divorce.

I guess the only thing holding me back from actually writing about it is that I think it is something I should share with my children when they are old enough to appreciate it before I put it out there in cyberspace. I figure I at least owe them that.

Not that I haven’t blogged about the demise of my marriage here in the past, however. Towards the end of 2004 I set myself a writing project whereby I had three months to do 50 chapters of an “autobiography” so obviously the breakup was going to be mentioned at some point! I found posting the chapters one by one on my blog to be a good way of getting feedback on both myself and my writing.

It was my son’s 10th birthday last weekend, and my ex-wife (aka MyX) and I brought himself and his sister out for a meal. They like doing that and I can hardly blame them, since many would take being able to talk to both your parents at the same time for granted, and since we have managed to keep things civil, it makes for a pleasant enough couple of hours for everyone involved.

Privately, though, it’s not easy to forget what happened in the past, on both of our parts. So in order to free myself of having to repress those feelings last Saturday, I will choose this particular chapter as one I wish to publish in my “backtracking” series this week. It is completely and utterly a true story.

stories worth a thousand words #39

A WARTS 'N ALL AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF AN ORDINARY GUY

1000 WORDS ON...CLOSURE



Written : December 7th, 2004

We went on an expedition that day, along a trail that led up the side of a large hill that was beside our family resort.

Once we rounded the corner to the area which we could not see from our apartment, there was a clearing that afforded a breathtaking view out into the vast Mediterranean. Since up to that day the sun had always emerged from here from our perspective, it wasn’t hard to deduce that this was a perfect spot to witness the sun rise, something I was yet to experience in my lifetime. I decided to set my alarm for about 5am the following morning in order to witness the daily spectacle.

I needed something to perk up my spirits, for up to then this had been The Holiday From Hell in every respect. On the surface it looked like the idyllic family vacation; me, my wife and my two beautiful children off to Ibiza for two weeks in May, with her mother and sister arriving the second week to provide some baby-sitting time for us to do some of the traditional couply stuff. The reality could not have been further away.

It had been St Patrick’s Day, March 17th, 2000, when MyX finally had the guts to tell me she had been having an affair with BikerBoy, and that she loved him. For some reason, despite all of this, I was convinced that once we went away together on the holiday that had been booked since before Christmas, we could somehow work it out. It was only in the airport lounge when I realized the two love birds were sending text messages back and forth to each other that it was clear that I would not be sending any “Wish You Were Here” postcards for the duration of the fortnight!

I did try one of the nights during the first week to sit her down and talk things through, after the kids had fallen asleep in the next room. There was no need for pleading my case, there was no need for bended knee; all it took was one question: “Will we at least give it a go for the sake of the kids?”

I could see her flinch for a brief moment, but then her resolve was clear in her face for all to see. “No, because I know that once I see BikerBoy again when we get back I will want to be with him.” So that was that.

Well, not quite. We had agreed to take turns sleeping in with the kids, and that night was mine. Shortly after I closed the door behind me she knocked and had a look of absolutely paralyzing terror all over her face. I can’t remember her exact words, but they were something along the lines of “Jeff PLEASE tell me you won’t do any harm to the kids tonight? PLEASE????”

She could have told me BikerBoy was there with us and that they were going to make love right in front of me and it could not have hurt me more. It was at that moment I realized how much power she had. All she had to do was run screaming down the corridor that her husband was a madman and I’d be thrown into a cell by a bunch of cops with poor English before I could say asta mañana.

With that I let her sleep in with the kids, and I set up the camper bed in the sitting room to get through what had to be the loneliest, most miserable sleepless night I have ever endured. Part of me actually felt guilty for being capable to do something drastic, even though I had never so much as hurt a fly in my life before.

Of course I know I wasn’t the innocent party in all of this. Of course I know I did many things to cause the failure of the marriage. To read this chapter up to now you may think this wasn’t the case. In fact, at that time in the Balearic paradise, all I could do was to lament my own part in the whole scenario. According to me I had driven her to this, what with getting fired from the sports store, the Airport Incident, and not changing job like MyX had demanded.

It wasn’t until I had plucked up the courage to relate the whole story to my fiancée Sandra that I was able to see that there were two people involved in this particular tango. Before I could get to this stage, however, I somehow needed closure from my twelve year association with MyX.

Being disposed to penning poetry and lyrics as I am, the potential symbolic nature of witnessing the sun rising over a clear blue sea was not lost on me as I set off into the darkness shortly after 5 that morning. When I reached my chosen vantage point, I was surprised how bright the area was without the aid of any artificial light. Upon turning my back to the watery stage, I realized the source of the illumination.

It was a perfect full moon which was well into its descent, and it was headed straight for a v-shaped gap between two distant hills. For a good half hour I pivoted back and forth in both directions, as the beaming satellite drew nearer to its destination on one side, and the blackness above the calm waters gradually turned to bright orange on the other.

I kid you not; the very moment the moon disappeared from view, I was spared the milli-second necessary to turn my head to witness the tiny bright halo appear over the distant horizon. It was as beautiful as anything I could imagine nature to show me, and as I sat down to take in the splendour of the giant radiant rugby ball coming into view I realized I had been treated to all the symbolic closure I had sought, and then some.

© JL Pagano 2004

Monday, July 23, 2007

bitesize bullets


A blog within a blog if you will…
I get to choose ten topics every Monday…
I get to write up to fifty words on ‘em…
Anyone ever measure Bush’s brain size?…

#1 : PREVIOUSLY, ON “ALL SMOKE AND MIRRORS”…

Twas a quiet week’s blogging for me. Last Wednesday I commented on the continuing Bertiegate saga, then on Friday I plugged a gig I was going to which turned out to be a good night out for everyone. The sports shorts covered Padraig Harrington’s triumph plus a bit of football.

#2 : A NOVEL IDEA : The story so far

OK – latest news is that I have chosen which of my various story ideas to focus on first. I want to do some reading myself before I get my creative juices flowing – I have Irvine Welsh’s latest on the go; next up, re-reading Catcher In The Rye.

#3 : FREE AT LAST!!!! [Soprano Finale Spoiler Warning!!!]

FINALLY I can remove the gag from my mouth and talk about the end of the Sopranos! I thought it was very brave of David Chase to end things so abruptly – rather than fall between the two stools of will he/won’t he live, he climbed up and rose above them.

#4 : JUST WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?

Fresh from my success in “outing” my reader last week (I’ll choose to keep their identities away from the blog btw) I would now like to hear from whoever works for Fidelity Investments in Boston, Massachusetts. It may be someone I know since I used to live there.

#5 : MIND OVER MATTER

Ananova’s Quirky files has an interesting story about a guy in France who led a perfectly normal life despite having an unusually tiny brain. For me, it only goes to show just how little we know about what exactly goes on in our noggins.

#6 : WEIGHING MY OPTIONS – WEEK 3 down 1lb on last week

Progress is still slow, mostly because I am still struggling to control my eating habits, though I’m gradually getting there. This week will see outdoor exercise COMBINED with some weights work at home so maybe that will help me get things going.

#7 : PET PEEVE OF THE WEEK

In murder trials, like the recent Rachel O’Reilly one, sympathy must go to the deceased’s loved ones for their rollercoaster of emotions as the facts come to light. To be falsely told the convicted murderer is to serve a so-called “life” sentence must be an even further source of pain.


#8 : WHO SANG THESE LYRICS?

“Wishing you could still make love
They're the ones who'll hate you
When you think you've got the world
All sussed out
They're the ones who'll spit at you
You will be the one screaming out.”

Check comments for the answer.

#9 : THE FIFTY WORD REVIEW : Prince – “Planet Earth”

The highest compliment I can pay this is that it’s his best since Sign O The Times, for I very much doubt anything will top that. The diminutive one seems to have finally rediscovered his muse, with the title track, “Guitar” and “The 1 U Wanna C” among the hits.

#10 : AND FINALLY…HERE’S WHAT PEOPLE RECENTLY GOOGLED TO GET HERE…

“cycling ointment”
“slang origin done and dusted”
“goya bean derogatory meaning”
“first computer blogging in my day”
“color styles website green”
“dunk asshole from setanta”
“gordon brown animated dancing”
“sorry you are leaving all the best”
“violin plucking tv”
“tsakalofas”


I hope they all found what they were looking for.

Sunday, July 22, 2007

jl's sports shorts



Weekends can't be for blogging about current affairs or anything like that – it’s a time to write about the stuff that REALLY matters!

OUT OF NOWHERE

Honest to God…I was watching the Open Championship right up to 3:30pm. Padraig Harrington wasn’t even in the running. If anything it was a three-horse race between Garcia, Stricker and Els. Having switched off and gone out for the afternoon, I just got home only to switch on the 9 o’clock news and find out that he actually did it!!! So much for my post you see below which I actually wrote on Saturday morning!!! It looks like it was a thriller of a finish. Well I have to say it’s high time Padraig realised his potential and took a major. He really did seem destined for a perpetual “always the bridesmaid tag” but that has well and truly gone today. True, he had to rely on a lot of help from Garcia losing his bottle to do it, but a strokeplay golf tournament is won over 72 holes and you have to keep it going right to the final day’s 18th green. Congratulations Paddy!!! Pic of the man himself courtesy of http://news.yahoo.com

THE LUCKY SHAMROCKS

Mon July 16 : eircom League Premier Division

Shamrock Rovers-2 UCD-0


After watching this match I’m left scratching my head. Just how on earth does the scoreline reflect the 90 minutes I just watched? This was an extremely rare occasion when the TV cameras decided to screen a game involving UCD, the very epitome of the so-called “unfashionable” side. Right before kickoff they interviewed the two managers. I used to work with Rovers' Pat Scully in a sports store – I never really liked him as he came across a bit of an arrogant so-and-so, but I guess that’s the kind of quality that comes in handy when you’re a football manager, and he was confident going into this match, describing his opponents as a “tricky” side. When UCD boss Pete Mahon was asked to comment afterwards, I was reminded of Kevin Keegan’s famous “I’d love it if we beat them!” tirade a few years ago. Pete seemed to be frustrated by his side being always patronised and he bravely forecasted a win fo his boys. Well if the winners were determined by amount of possession and quality of play, he would have been proven right. Unfortunately, you’re supposed win a football match by legally putting a ball in the back of the net, and even when UCD did that, they were denied. After dominating the first half to no avail, the Students got a free kick after the restart. Conor Byrne clearly sprung the offside trap to slot the ball past the keeper but for some reason the assistant on the far side didn’t notice he was a good three yards onside and disallowed the goal. A mere five minutes later, Rovers found the visitors' one weakness as reserve keeper Gregg flapped at a corner from the left which allowed Gerard Rowe to put the home side into a totally undeserved 1-0 lead. The game then reverted back to its pattern, with UCD enjoying long spells of possession without being able to find a decent finish despite the valiant efforts of their front two Sammon and Forsyth. Then the weakness was exploited yet again, as an injury to pacy midfielder Fitzgerald meant another cross coming in from the left which once again Gregg couldn’t deal with – this allowed former Belfield Park man Tadhg Purcell to easily nod in a second to secure the points and make the score a complete mockery of the run of play. This result means UCD are being sucked into a relegation dog-fight as they are a mere three points ahead of the play-off spot, but surely on this performance they shouldn’t have much to fear for the rest of the season. I think Mahon is right to talk up his squad, but at the end of the day he should be proud of his side as they continue to defy the odds and remain in the top flight. Pic of Rovers' goal-scorer Purcell challenging Conor Kenna for the ball courtesy of http://www.rte.ie/

CLUBBING IN CARNOUSTIE

Ah, it’s that time of year for “The” Open Championship, and that of course can mean only one thing – time for me to dig out my Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2003 PS2 game again and try once more to get past my nemesis Steve Stricker so I can gain the “G” of my “T-I-G-E-R” in the Tiger Challenge. I actually took him to the 18th hole yesterday, but sadly my lack of mastery of the back 9 on the Highlands course was my downfall yet again. Oh – were you expecting me to comment on the actual British Open itself? You must be joking!!! Don’t you think I have better use of my time than watch people hit golf balls all day? Sure – if an Irishman is in contention on Sunday afternoon I’ll sit down and watch, but the first three rounds are always a major league snoozefest, beaten only by the Irish-language Tour de France coverage I referred to last week. No, the only TV golf that gets my pulse racing 24/7 is the Ryder Cup – the team element together with the chance to watch the smug egostistical Yanks get another pasting is up there with the best sporting entertainment around, and I would be all on for holding the tournament every year. Stroke play just doesn’t do it for me, unless of course I’m holding a controller shouting obscenities at some guy called Stricker who surely must be cheating. Pic of early Open pacesetter Sergio Garcia lining up a putt courtesy of http://news.yahoo.com/


YET MORE EARTHQUAKES TO HIT THE BAY AREA

Back in the days of yore, my country of birth the USA had a soccer league called the NASL. They had as many as 24 clubs at one stage, they attracted stars such as Pele, Best and Beckenbauer, and they had a curious system which meant you could get as many as 9 league points from one match. They tried to model themselves on the other more established American sports, with razzamatazz, cheerleaders, nicknames, mascots, and they even called the Championship game the “Soccer Bowl”. My Bay Area had represented by a team called the San Jose Earthquakes. Unfortunately, the league was a flop. Clubs dropped frm existence like ninepins and when they finally called it a day there were only six left standing. There was to be no more professional soccer in the USA until the formation of Major League Soccer after the 1994 World Cup. A franchise was awarded to San Jose and thus the Earthquakes were reborn, and they even won a Championship or two themselves. To my horror, I discovered a couple of years ago that the team had upped and left, to of all places Houston, Texas. Now called the Dynamoes, they won the Championship in their first season in 2006. Just last Friday I learned that the owner of my favourite baseball club, the Oakland A’s, has decided to revive the Earthquakes once more and a new club with that name will become an “expansion” team next season. Clearly the possibilty of establishing a rivalry with the LA Galaxy and also the “Becks Factor” (has anyone else coined that yet? Can I claim it?) were reasons behind the investment. I am very happy the Bay Area will once again be represented at the highest level – there is such a large Hispanic community not to mention all the other soccer-mad nationalities and surely the market is there once it is promoted properly. Go Quakes!!! Pic of the various investors announcing the re-creation of the club courtesy of http://web.mlsnet.com/

Friday, July 20, 2007

shameless plug


Hi folks,

If you’re looking for something to do of a Friday evening, you can do worse than head down to the Cherry Tree in Walkinstown tonight and catch some live music for as little as €5 (it’s a tenner if you’re on your own OR if you have someone with you). Dave Dwyer (aka “Bead”) is playing – he is not only a good friend of mine, but he also has a wide repetoire of excellent one-man-and-his-guitar original material you’ll be sure to sing along to. Think David Gray and you have the right area. Check out his website and myspace page for a sample or two, and I’ll see you down there. If you spot me and mention my blog I may even buy you a jar.

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

you get what you vote for…or do you?



Sure, I could write for pages and pages about Comrade Bertski’s testimony at the tribunal.

I could pick apart what he said, compare it to what he’s said before, compare it to what tangible evidence he has.

But I really, really, really don’t want to.

What I want is for all this bullshit put behind us once and for all. I wish someone would just ask him…"Look, we know you want to be getting on with leading the country and all, so just tell us – is any of this cash bogus or what?"

If it turns out that there is a serious fire to go along with all the smoke we see in the headlines each day, then I presume he’ll have to step down.

What would that say about the democracy under which we live? Fianna Fáil went before the people as “Bertie’s team”. Do we still let them run the place if their leader’s reputation was built on quicksand?

The simple answer is, of course we do as we have no choice, unless of course the Greens strap on a pair and try to bring them down, and somehow I can’t see Sven Gormley Eriksson passing up this chance to hold the reins.

So to recap … if Bertie has to resign over his own personal “-gate” (if the Tánaiste has a scandal would that be called Cow & Gate?), then our nation would be governed by a coalition of three parties, NONE of whom were being headed by the leaders we were presented with in May.

Do you need me to make this point for you, Mr Kenny?

Monday, July 16, 2007

bitesize bullets


A blog within a blog if you will…
I get to choose ten topics every Monday…
I get to write up to fifty words on ‘em…
Talk about switching to the other side…

#1 : PREVIOUSLY, ON “ALL SMOKE AND MIRRORS”…

Last week I republished a story about the importance of getting someone’s name right, together with a separate post to set it up. On Thursday my mother did her periodic post on stateside political matters. The weekend’s sports shorts were about football, gaelic and rugby, plus a few random thoughts.

#2 : DYING TO BE ON THE TELLY

From Ananova’s Quirky files… a former TV producer has joined forces with Germany's funeral association to launch a 24-hour, seven days a week channel on cable television and the internet devoted to the ageing process, death and dying. Sounds weird, but if it doesn’t work out, it’s their funeral!!!

#3 : PET PEEVE OF THE WEEK

OK – this will be the last driving one for a while I promise…but just how difficult is it for people to park their cars between the lines provided? When I see someone badly parked like that it makes me feel like they’re screaming “fuck you” to the world.

#4 : WEIGHING MY OPTIONS : Week 2 Level with last week

Not sure why things levelled off this week, but at least my increases have stopped for now. In my early twenties I would jog every day - hopefully I’ll be able to build myself up to getting back to it again. A daily walk has been a good start.

#5 : THE NOVEL – the story so far

Rather than have four half-baked ideas for novels mulling around my noggin, I have decided to concentrate on one project at a time to try and get things done – maybe forcing myself to do a progress bullet every week will help. I’ll have a beginning to report next week.

#6 : THE FIFTY WORD REVIEW : Shrek the Third

I did laugh at this movie, at times as much as I thought I would. I did get a sense, however, that the theme has been stretched to its limits, and I sincerely hope they don’t make a fourth, though according to imdb, there’s one slated for 2010.

#7 : JUST WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?

Still nobody wants to own up to reading my blog via Daniel Williams Consultancy, so I’ll extend my request for one more week before I move on. I’m just curious as to who my regular readers are, and I wouldn’t mind checking out their blogs if they have one.

#8 : SORKIN WHEN HE WAS ONLY GETTING WARMED UP

After watching the 1998 drama Sports Night, it appears the writers were looking for three things to improve – a full hour per episode, no canned laughter, and a setting more suited to their politically-charged plotlines. Luckily they got it when they moved on to produce The West Wing in ‘99.

#9 : WHO SANG THESE LYRICS?

“Cynthia wore the prettiest dress
With different color socks
Sometimes I wondered if the mates where in her lunchbox
Me and Lucy opened it when Cynthia wasn't around
Lucy cried, I almost died, U know what we found?”


Check comments for the answer.

#10 : AND FINALLY…HERE’S WHAT PEOPLE RECENTLY GOOGLED TO GET HERE…

“gunshop ireland”
“reproduction playgroup”
“goya bean derogatory meaning”
“cootamundra gemma”
“people named after the place where they were conceived”
“anyone who can get himself elected president should not be allowed to run douglas adams”
“definition toe-poke scottish slang”


I hope they all found what they were looking for.

Sunday, July 15, 2007

jl's sports shorts


Weekends can't be for blogging about current affairs or anything like that – it’s a time to write about the stuff that REALLY matters!


YET ANOTHER WALK IN THE PARK

Sunday July 15 : Leinster Senior Football Final

Dublin 3-14 Laois 1-14


Now I won’t profess for a moment to have any kind of tactical knowledge about the game of Gaelic Football, but I’d be reasonably confident enough to say that Dublin won the Leinster title without ever having to even go into second gear in the process. It was a sorry Offaly team, a sorry Meath team (and it took us two bites at that cherry) and yesterday’s Laois team wasn’t much better to be honest. Let’s be clear – the difference between the two teams was two goals, and one of ours was dodgy, while they cracked one off the crossbar – things could have been a whole lot closer. And given the nature of the All-Ireland Championship these days, in many ways yesterday’s victory is almost something of a hindrance. Sure, any trophy is a good thing, but the Dubs’ fans measure real success by winning the Sam Maguire and nothing less, and now, they can’t afford to lose a game. We were in exactly the same spot this time last year, and when we finally came across a Mayo team that was up for a challenge, we weren’t up for it ourselves. I think an early loss plus a journey through the qualifiers may be just the thing this team needs. It’s not as though we don’t have the talent in abundance, with the likes of Brogan, Vaughan, Sherlock and Whelan to choose from, plus the ability to bring Mossy Quinn off the bench and have him lob over a breathtaking point with virtually his first kick of the ball. I just hope I’m wrong. Pic of Bernard Brogan celebrating a goal courtesy of www.rte.ie

ROBBIE COMES HOME

Thursday, July 12, 2007 : Pre-season Friendly

St Patrick’s Athletic-0 Tottenham Hotspur-1


I suppose I should have done my homework. I heard about this game last Sunday, and told my son I’d bring him to it. For some reason I thought this would be like any other football match here in Ireland, in that I only had to show up on the night and I could buy a ticket. Imagine my horror when I heard on the radio Thursday afternoon that the game had been sold out for two weeks! That took a bit of explaining to my son! We could have gone anyway and scalped some tickets, but he was philosophical about it and said he’d rather stay at home and watch it on the telly since it would probably rain anyway. Phew! As for the game itself, although the result wasn’t important, it was a chance to put my Spurs’ new players on display, namely Gareth Bale, Younis Kaboul and up front, Darren Bent. Of the three of them I was most impressed by Kaboul, partly because I knew little about him to begin with, partly because he has a John-Terry-type presence in the penalty area and looks like he could give Michael Dawson a run for his money in the squad, which can only be good for the team. Second in my newbie ranking is Bent, who got into good positions but failed to make any use of them – hopefully that’s down to new-team nerves which will be gone by August. As for Bale, I didn’t see him have one good touch at all, but he is very young (I think he’s 18 though he looks closer to 12) so he’s really a buy for the future more than anything. All in all it was an extremely boring game so I guess it’s a good thing we didn’t go, but I am glad Robbie Keane both scored the goal and played the full 90 minutes. Next up is a tour of South Africa which is also being screened on Setanta. Pic of Robbie in action at Richmond Park courtesy of www.tottenhamhotspur.com

HOLD THE PRESSES – BO’D IS LEINSTER CAPTAIN

I got an email during the week. A few years ago I signed up for the Leinster rugby newsletter. I doubt I have read it more than once since. This one seemed interesting to me however. I was being informed that in hardly the most breathtaking bit of news ever to be released, Brian O’Driscoll has been re-appointed captain of his province for the upcoming rugby season. At first I wondered why exactly they would want me to know that, but then I saw the next item of news they had on offer. Leinster season tickets now on sale. Apparently buying your ticket will… * Insure you don't miss the three Heineken Cup Pool matches against Edinburgh, Leicester Tigers, and Toulouse, as well as all Magners League home matches (Of those matches, which total only 11 games, you can only be sure that O’Driscoll will be playing in the 3 Heiniken Cup games, if even them) * Secure your seat for future seasons in the RDS, as you will have first refusal to renew your seat (I have a feeling that tickets will still be available next season anyway, don’t you?) * Give you a discount compared to buying on the day (True, but Leinster supporters are so fickle I doubt even those who do buy the tickets will actually go to every game thus the discount will be gone) * Give you access to away match tickets (see above) * Gain entry into a draw for Home International match tickets (ah…the old “entry into a draw” incentive…) * Secure your membership of the Official Leinster Supporters Club (which only means you will get this same email again next year). Sorry for being so sceptical, but the truth is I’m not really having a go at Leinster rugby, more at European rugby and how its season is structured, though you’ve heard that argument from me several times before. Let’s just say I’d be more inclined to buy tickets to all Leinster’s matches if I knew there was a chance they’d be putting out their strongest team every time I took the time to don my jersey and scarf and show up at the RDS. Particularly in World Cup year, that is just not going to happen. Pic of BO’D in action courtesy of www.magnersleague.com



Sometimes I just have a very brief comment to make about matters sporting, hence this new feature…


• I discovered during the week a sporting event more boring to watch on TV than the Tour de France…the Tour de France with commentary in Irish on TG4.

• My Oakland A’s have lost their last 6 in a row and they are 9½ games behind their nearest rival. I think I’ll stop my weekly update as their progress is getting too depressing.

• OUCH!!! Did you see that guy get stabbed by a wayward javelin??? Check it out!!!

• The very first match of the 2007/08 Premiership is at the Stadium of Light between my Spurs and Roy Keane's Sunderland and it will be live on Sky Sports at 12:45pm on August 11.

Thursday, July 12, 2007

was a-political by maura lee

The latest report from my Washington correspondent, aka Mom.

#7 : In America, “justice” is now spelled “just us”


Bush commutes Libby prison sentence

On July 2, 2007, George Bush issued a statement saying that he had decided it was time for him to do something about Scooter Libby , who that morning had been told that he would very soon be headed for prison.

What Bush had decided to do was to commute the portion of the sentence requiring Libby to spend 30 months in prison while leaving in place the fine and probation.

The reasons that he gave were:

1. No one was ever charged with the underlying crime;
2. Libby’s sentence was based on allegations that were never presented to the jury;
3. the district court that sentenced Libby had rejected the advice of the probation office that had recommended a lighter sentence;
4. the sentence was excessive;
5. the constitution gives him the power to do this when he deemed it to be warranted and it was his judgment that commuting Libby’s prison sentence was an appropriate exercise of this power.

Immediately following the release of this statement, the White House switchboard was closed to the public.

Surprised?

The reaction to this was immediate, and mostly expected, and like just about everything else during the past 6 1/2 years, highly partisan. Once the initial reactions had been made and Bush’s statement more carefully read, however, the questions began – for example:

Q.: Timing – why now? Bush said that he would let the process run its course before getting involved, but he jumped in before the appeals court issued a judgment. Why?
A.: One word – prison time. With the appeals court denying Libby’s request to stay out of prison until his appeal was heard, this meant that within 30-40 days Libby would have to report to the Bureau of Prisons for his jumpsuit.

Q.: Was Libby’s sentence REALLY excessive?
A.: According to federal data, the average sentence for obstruction of justice is 70 months. Obstruction of justice was only one of the four crimes of which Libby was found guilty.

Q.: No one was ever charged with the underlying crime of violating the Intelligence Identities Protection Act, so why did the investigation continue?
A. By the time Patrick Fitzgerald was appointed Special Prosecutor on this case, Libby’s account had been sharply contradicted by the accounts of other witnesses. It would have been a dereliction of his duty had Fitzgerald not continued to investigate in order to determine why these lies were being told.

Q. Why didn’t Bush just give Libby a pardon? Why only commute the prison sentence?
A.: Had Bush pardoned Libby, he could have been called to testify about matters that might “embarrass” the administration. By merely commuting the prison sentence, Bush assured that Libby’s Fifth Amendment rights, that guarantee a person’s right to avoid incriminating himself, remain in place. White House press secretary Tony Snow has also made it clear that a future pardon is still very possible.

Base to Bush: Pardon him. This is not a request.

No sooner had the jury returned their guilty verdict on Libby than the editorial page of the Wall Street Journal published “The Libby Travesty: Mr. Bush owes the former aide a pardon, and an apology” (published on March 7th) which argued that critics of the war on Iraq were using the guilty verdict as proof that Bush & Co. lied us into war, ergo Bush must pardon Libby to prove them wrong.

The editorial bemoaned the fact that Libby had not espoused the grand jury strategy of Harold Ickes, which was saying, “I don’t recall”, or variations thereof, to every threatening question. As we would soon see, tactical amnesia would soon become the strategy of choice for Bush & Co.

An even more incredible claim this story makes is that, because Bush & Co. did not interfere with the appointment of Patrick Fitzgerald – because they “allowed Attorney General John Ashcroft to recuse himself and Mr. Fitzgerald to be appointed….”, the president owes Libby an apology for the matter having gotten this far. Attorney General John Ashcroft recused himself on the matter three months into the investigation, when it became known that he was receiving regular progress reports from the FBI. The fact that at the time Karl Rove was a major target in the investigation, and that Ashcroft had paid Rove $750,000 to guide his Senate campaign, made Ashcroft’s recusal mandatory, and the suggestion that this should have been circumvented by the White House is disgraceful.

The National Review published GOP Presidential hopeful Fred Thompson’s opinion piece the same day, and it made similar points (naturally, as the WSJ and the NR feed off the same “Talkers”), accusing the Justice Department of folding under political and media pressure because of the Plame leak, stating, “When DOJ made the appointment (of special counsel) they knew that the leak did not constitute a violation of the law”, which is not true, but even if it had been, is not relevant to the procedure by which the Department of Justice operates when it conducts investigations.

Incipient events

On March 7th, when these outrageous charges appeared in the mainstream media, it was not yet known how the Department of Justice had been changed since Alberto Gonzales replaced John Ashcroft as Attorney General.

The public was not yet privy to the fact that the Justice Department, under the leadership of Bush’s old Texas crony and former White House attorney, had become a wholly owned subsidiary of the Republican National Committee. Karl Rove, directing more than smears and leak cover-ups, was working hard to realize his dream of ensuring that the USA would be a one-party state for as long as he and the RNC could maintain it.

The CIA leak investigation began in the fall of 2003 and it is fair to say that an administration as politically motivated as Bush & Co. would, with presidential elections only a year away, see everything – every action, every decision, every response – through a prism of the upcoming campaign. Staying in power was what drove them and all else flowed from this.

Back to the trial

On January 19, 2007, Scooter Libby’s team of lawyers (“Team Libby”) filed their proposed jury instruction describing the theory of defense they would use to argue Libby’s innocence.

This straightforward 2-page document denies that Libby ever intended to or did commit any of the crimes for which he was indicted. In essence, Team Libby’s defense would be that when he testified under oath to the grand jury, and when he answered the questions put to him by the FBI, he “misspoke” because he was so involved in other (more important) things like national security, and that Joe Wilson and his wife were so unimportant to him that it is ludicrous to suggest that he would even recall who they were, never mind actively try to get journalists to print bad things about them.

Wells delivers a shocker

Imagine the surprise, then, when Team Libby lawyer Theodore Wells began his opening statement on January 23rd with this:

“Scooter Libby is innocent. … He did not give any false statements to the FBI he is an innocent man, and he has been wrongly and unjustly and unfairly accused.”

“Now, there will be some people at the White House – at the White House, not the office of the vice president – who you will learn may have pushed reporters to write stories about Ms. Wilson.”

“Now, Mr. Fitzgerald suggested that Mr. Libby might have a motive to lie because Mr. McClellan, the president’s press secretary, went on TV and said, anybody involved in leaking classified information, you are going to lose your job….(Mr. Libby) was not concerned about losing his job. He was concerned about being set up. He was concerned about being the scapegoat for this entire Valerie Wilson controversy.”

“And Mr. Libby, you will learn, went to the vice president of the United States and met with the vice president in private. Mr. Libby said to the vice president, I think the White House – people over there in the White House, not the office of the vice president – people in the White House are trying to set me up. People in the White House are trying to sacrifice me. People in the White House want me to be a scapegoat. People in the White House are trying to protect a man named Karl Rove, the president’s right-hand man.”

“Karl Rove was President Bush’s right-hand person in terms of political strategy. Karl Rove was the person most responsible for making sure that the Republican Party stayed in office. He was viewed as a political genius. His fate was important to the Republican Party if they were going to stay in office. He had to be protected.”

“And the person who was to be sacrificed – “sacrifice the guy” – that’s Scooter Libby. Scooter Libby was to be sacrificed. Karl Rove was to be protected.”

From scorched earth to pussycat

How we looked forward with great anticipation to the testimony of both Dick Cheney and Scooter Libby! How disappointed we were to hear on February 13th that neither of them would take the stand!

What happened to Team Libby’s accusations of January 23rd? Why would Wells put forth such a dramatic narrative, Libby as scapegoat, Rove as golden boy, without offering any evidence to back it up - acting as if it had never happened – as if the dramatic accusations had never taken place?

A possible hint was contained in paragraph 14 of a March 8th Washington Post story:

“Despite the defense’s trial argument that Libby was made a scapegoat by the White House, aides and advisers said there is no anger toward him in the West Wing. Libby’s defense team reached out to an intermediary after its opening statement to reassure the White house about its strategy, according to a source close to the situation.” (Emphasis is mine.)

Why would that be? Why would an administration with the reputation of having a teenager’s twitchy metabolism and self-centered view of the world, not be angry at such accusations? What reassurance did Team Libby offer the White House? That they were “just kidding”? And if so, then what was the point?

For two weeks the prosecution presented its case, but then on February 13th, with the defense having called only two witnesses, Team Libby made the shocking announcement that

 Dick Cheney would not be called to testify;
 Scooter Libby would not testify in his own behalf;
 The defense would rest its case at this point.

The reaction was immediate. Mine was something like, “WHAT? You call that a DEFENSE? What are you afraid of? That Cheney’d lose it and start babbling?” I will admit to being distraught.

That Libby himself would not testify was in itself a shock, as seasoned prosecutors and defense lawyers know that any defendant hoping for a not guilty verdict to a perjury charge must be prepared to look the jury in the collective eye and say that he did not lie, or that he made an honest error.

Coded messages

So Team Libby folded up its tent and called it a day and the case went to the jury and the rest is history; eventually most of the questions about Wells’ mysterious disappearing defense strategy faded with all the other strange, secretive things that enfold this administration.

But what if Team Libby wasn’t just “kidding” but sending a message to the White House? Recall this sentence from the March 8th Washington Post story:

“Libby’s defense team reached out to an intermediary after its opening statement to reassure the White house about its strategy, according to a source close to the situation.” (Emphasis is mine.)

What if the “reaching out” that Team Libby did to the White House was in the form of a demand that a deal be made, a quid pro quo: Team Libby would drop the scapegoat theory if Bush would promise to keep Libby out of prison.

Such a deal would explain the timing – why Bush couldn’t wait until Libby’s appeal had “run its course”, because Libby would have had to spend that time in prison.

In his opening statement, Team Libby lawyer Ted Wells mentioned Karl Rove seventeen times, usually in the context of “sacrifice Libby, protect Rove”, and hammered home that Rove was important to the Republican Party if they were going to stay in office.

Wells makes a clear distinction between the White House, where George Bush and Karl Rove work, and the office of the vice president, where Libby worked.

An offer they could not refuse

“Protect Karl Rove. Sacrifice Scooter Libby. The person whose neck had been put into the meat grinder, you will learn, was Scooter Libby. The vice president and the president of the United States – because the note is very interesting. The note, when you see it, has “the pres” – P-R-E-S—and then vice president Cheney crosses that out.”

“And then the person whose neck was put into the meat grinder was Scooter Libby. And the meat grinder that he had been put into was to be tasked to go out and talk to certain reporters, not about Valerie Wilson, but to talk to reporters about this entire controversy concerning whether or not the president’s 16 words in the State of the Union were accurate or some kind of misrepresentation.”

“But unlike Karl Rove, you will learn Mr. Libby had not been out pushing stories about Ms. Wilson.”

“But, again, Mr. Libby was just a staffer. He was just a guy working on national security. He was an important staffer, but Karl Rove was the lifeblood of the Republican Party.”

The White House is not the only target - the Republican National Committee should also take note. This would go a long way to explain the Libby Defense Fund, and the impassioned, illogical and downright untruthful requests for donations made by frightening women.

Now what?

By commuting and not pardoning, Bush has guaranteed that Libby will not be subpoenaed to testify anytime soon, because commuting a sentence the way Bush did it leaves in place Libby’s ability to plead the Fifth Amendment, while a pardon would remove the stain from Libby’s record, but it would also leave him vulnerable to those mean Democrats and their nasty subpoenas.

Byron York wants Libby pardoned and bemoans the fact that Bush did not make an impassioned statement such as his father did in December 1992 when he pardoned former defense secretary Casper Weinberger and the other crooks of Iran-contra infamy.

George H. W. Bush called patriotism the “common denominator of their motivation” and using the pardons as an opportunity to denounce what he called “a profoundly troubling development in the political and legal climate of our country: the criminalization of policy differences”.

York also tells us that the president’s last 18 months in office without his base will force him to “…exercise power based not on his political clout but rather on the authority the Constitution gives the office of the president: He is commander in chief. He can veto bills. He can issue pardons. And that’s about it.”

I, for one, would be eternally grateful if this is all George Bush is allowed to do to this country in the last months of his brutal presidency.


Wednesday, July 11, 2007

backtracking

My grandmother, who passed away last August less than a week after my wedding, would have been 98 years young yesterday.

I wrote a post around Christmas time called “Clearing the Cobwebs” where I boldly assured that I would put the past behind me and carry on regardless.

But of course, we can rarely carry on regardless, can we? Surely it’s possible nay VITAL to be able to proceed towards your future while taking with you a healthy regard for the past?

With this in mind I have chosen this quaint yet slightly tragic story which I published back in April 2005 to act as my backtracking post for this week. Were she alive today to read it she would say I was mocking her. I hope now she realises that it demonstrates how much more I understood her than she gave me credit for.

Happy birthday, Grandma, from all of us.

what's in a name indeed!!!

When I worked in the pub just up the road from me there was a lounge girl called Carina.

I always noted her name because, well ok, she was quite attractive, but I was also dying to ask her if she was named after the Toyota automobile. You know what I mean, how some people are named after the place where they were conceived?

She worked with us for over a year, and never shied away from joining in the fun we all had while employed there. Whenever we went to the local nightclub after work (which was often) she’d tag along, and she wasn’t averse to joining in on our plans to haze the new staff by being the one to request that they go to the other pub down the road for a bucket of steam or a can of striped paint.

Like many of the staff, indeed like my good self, Carina was only working there to earn money for socializing through university. When she eventually did hang up her tray, we had one hell of a night out to see her off. A couple of weeks later, she came in to pick up her tax documentation for she was starting a new job in a solicitor’s office downtown.

I was on duty when she collected her papers. I got them for her out of the safe, and could not help noticing they had her name spelled “Críona” (which in Irish would be pronounced “CREE-na”).

I was intrigued. As I handed the papers to her I had to ask: “How do you spell your name?”

“C – R – I – fatha (Irish word for the accent thingy) – O – N – A”.

So much for my conception theory. Thank God I never asked her.

I then took down the duty roster clipboard which was posted on the wall nearby and which had some of the older versions still attached.

“Did you not know your name has been spelled wrong on the roster all the time you were working here?” I asked in sheer disbelief.

“Ah, sure”, came the classic Irish reply, “I didn’t want to cause a fuss!”

I’ve always remembered Críona and her story because, well ok, she was quite attractive, but also because whenever my name gets spelled incorrectly by somebody I fall over myself to set them straight. My full name is Jeffrey and naturally I had to shorten it to Jeff, but living here in Ireland I have had to endure seeing my name written as “Geoffrey” which apparently is the original form that originated in England.

That may be very interesting factual information to some people, but I am not Geoff. Nothing wrong with that spelling other than it’s not exactly phonetic, but either way, it’s not me. Nowadays I am so used to saying my name to people this way “My name is Jeff - that’s J as in Jellyfish ee eff eff” that I fully expect to start getting junk mail addressed to that sentence.

Your name is who you are. Sure, the original form was inflicted on you when you had no comeback, but I think it’s safe to say that by the time a person reaches adulthood they can be comfortable with what they wish to be called. If you have dealings with someone new and they get your name wrong at first, it’s up to you to nip the incorrectness in the bud early.

There’s a woman in our neighbourhood called Barbara Kennedy. Well, for reasons both obvious and ironic, that’s not her real name, but it’s close. She is extremely religious, and she delivers Holy Communion to elderly people in the area on a daily basis. When I moved in to be my grandmother’s carer, Barbara asked me if I wanted her to stop coming every day. I told her under no circumstances did I want my elderly relative’s routine disrupted by my presence, and that actually she enjoyed seeing her every day (I almost said “someone closer to her age” but thought better of it).

Every day, I'd let her in and she'd go into Grandma’s room to administer the host and pray for a while. Each time she would greet her, she would refer to her as “Anna” instead of “Ann”. I thought she had heard her wrong the first time she met and, like Críona, she was too polite to correct her daily visitor.

Last Thursday, as I was seeing Barbara out the door, we were involved in a bit of small talk, and she used the name “Anna” once again, so I took the opportunity to point out that there was in fact no second “a” in her name. She looked surprised and was very convincing in her assertion that Grandma had introduced herself as Anna and that this was how she had been christened.

After she left I decided to go through once more the mountain of paperwork my grandfather had left behind and see if I could dig out her birth certificate. As I sifted through the papers, page after page would have her down as “Ann” on bank statements, correspondence and such. Eventually, I found her baptismal certificate.

Barbara was right.

I went into my grandmother straight away.

“Grandma? This is going to sound like a funny question but…”

“Oh, no, what did I do wrong now?”

“No, no, it’s nothing wrong, but I have to ask you, even though I’ve known you for the past 36 years, em, what’s your first name?”

“Well, I was christened Anna Mary Kilroy”

“So you didn’t like the name Anna that’s why you shortened it to Ann?”

“No, I always loved my name!”

“But you were married to Grandpa for 68 years and he always called you Ann?”

“Well, the person that introduced us referred to me as Ann”

“And didn’t you ever correct him?”

“No, it wasn’t really my place”

“So he never ever knew what your real name was?”

“No, I suppose he didn’t!”

I didn’t want to pry too much more as I didn’t want her to have another reason to feel bad about herself – she generally comes up with enough reasons to do that all on her own. It wasn't really that big a deal I suppose. Instead I said something like “OK, well, I was just wondering, would you like some coffee?” and said no more about it.

All that was left for me to do was dig out my own baptismal certificate and verify that I was in fact really called Jeffrey (with a J) and get on with my life.




Click here for a full list of the "Lifeslice" stories

Monday, July 09, 2007

bitesize bullets


A blog within a blog if you will…
I get to choose ten topics every Monday…
I get to write up to fifty words on ‘em…
Yippe ki-yay, mother-f***er…

#1 : PREVIOUSLY, ON “ALL SMOKE AND MIRRORS”…

Last Wednesday I gave my annual July 4th rant about my love-hate relationship with the USA, plus I republished lyrics from a song I wrote about it. Friday I bemoaned the questionable judgement of both known and unknown Irish people during the week. Sports shorts covered footie and tennis.

#2 : JUST WHO THE HELL ARE YOU???

For this new series of bullets, I mean the title in a good way. My stats program has turned up a few regular blog readers I’m curious about. First, if you work in Daniel Williams Consultancy would you like to make yourself known? You can email me at jlpaganoAT eircomDOTnet.

#3 : THE FIFTY WORD REVIEW : Die Hard 4.0

The sequels are getting steadily better in this franchise but they will never ever come close to the original. This strays a bit too close to glorified American clap-trap but I guess when you stack it up against movies like Armegeddon and Independence Day it’s not quite as bad.

#4 : PET PEEVE OF THE WEEK

I’m a bit nerdy about booking cinema tickets in advance online and I try to get the seats at the top of the stairs. Though I’m not at all afraid to boot people out who chance their arm sitting there, it’s a pain in the arse having to shift them.

#5 : IS IT BEBO FROM GROWNUPS OR WHAT???

Thanks to everyone who has invited me to join Facebook. I was happy to oblige and add them to my friends list, but I’m a bit unsure as to what it is or how I can use it so I hope noone gets offended if I leave my homepage idle!

#6 : WHO SANG THESE LYRICS?

“Standing at the bus stop
with my shopping in my hands
when I'm overhearing elderly ladies
as the rumours start to fly”


Check comments for the answer.

#7 : LIBBY SCOOTS AWAY FROM THE CAN

Should we loyal Bush-bashers have been all that surprised when we heard Dubya had commuted Lewis “Scooter” Libby’s sentence? It’s not quite a pardon - he’s still guilty - but he doesn’t have to do time, and no doubt he’ll walk on to a dozen republican-friendly boards of directors.

#8 : WEIGHING MY OPTIONS 2 – WEEK 2 DOWN 3lbs ON LAST WEEK

My missus hits the gym three or four times per week so I guess appointing her my “personal trainer” has an ounce of sense about it. We’re focusing on diet for the first few weeks but hopefully when the exercise kicks in the falling pounds will turn to stones!

#9 : CHANNEL 4 HOPING TO PULL OFF A FAKE-OUT

Whoever gets evicted in Big Brother 8 on Friday will be allowed to bitch about the others by Davina as usual, BUT it will be shown live to the other housemates, after which the evictee will be chucked straight back in! Will it rescue the poor ratings? Hmmm…

#10 : AND FINALLY…HERE’S WHAT PEOPLE GOOGLED LAST WEEK TO GET HERE…

“what new leagues are included in fifa08”
“can i watch galway hurling on my computer on rte 2”
“american band require backline rental in dublin ireland”
“the time has come bed's on fire”
“carling cup pointless competition”

I hope they all found what they were looking for.

Courtesy of www.statcounter.com

Saturday, July 07, 2007

jl's sports shorts


Weekends can't be for blogging about current affairs or anything like that – it’s a time to write about the stuff that REALLY matters!


TWO HOURS WELL SPENT - PITY NOBODY ELSE KNEW ABOUT IT!!!

Monday July 2 : Eircom League Cup Quarterfinal

UCD-2 Finn Harps-1


Although I was of course interested in how this game turned out being a UCD supporter, my main focus of attention last Monday was to see if there was any change in how the FAI presented the contest to the general public. At the beginning of the season we were promised that not only would the be a “promotions officer” for the entire country, there would also be one assigned to each team to further the marketing of the league. Well this might have a match in the least important of the FAI sanctioned tournaments, but it is still a senior game and it is still an opportunity to get people down to the ground to watch football played at the highest standard in the country after the international team, which only takes the field six or seven times a year. So as for the match itself, UCD took an early two-goal lead and held on despite Finn Harps pulling one back in the second half. Woo-hoo! But as for the presentation…in the picture you see a copy of the FAI website’s homepage on Monday morning. Here’s what the different links are telling you about… 1. The headline, FAI summer camps (moneyspinning) 2. New development officer for Sligo (yawn) 3. News about Underage Women’s football 4. News about Underage Men’s football 5. More news about underage men’s football 6. Another link to the summer camps (moneyspinning) 7. News about the FAI awards, even though the season isn’t half over yet 8. Link to the FAI online store (moneyspinning) 9. Link to news on safety standards (the only relevant link I could find) 10. Link to news on the new Lansdowne Road (which won’t be ready for at least three years) 11. The standings in Ireland’s Euro2008 qualifying group (which won’t change until August). Now maybe I’m being picky, but I firmly believe that it’s the FAI’s duty to inform the public that on a given evening there is actually a senior game going on near you, as well as tell you how easily you can get there! And that information should hit you square in the jaw when you visit their website! Anyway…then I brought my son to the match in the evening – as usual, nothing on display at the gates of Belfield Park to tell the public there’s a match on. Then we move into the ground – they graciously lowered the kids rate from €7 to €5, and my ticket cost €15. We got what we thought were prime seats in the covered stand right at the half-way line, and yes, we got a good view of the action, except when the action went on behind the three pillars which were in our way!!! And THEY STILL DON’T HAVE A BLOODY SCOREBOARD!!! And finally, the folowing morning, there were reports of the game on both the UCD and the Finn Harps websites, but back at FAI.ie, there was still the preview from the day before which you had to negotiate a series of links to find. So to summarize, by the final whistle my son and I both felt like we had a good time, had gotten our money’s worth of entertainment (Methins’ goal for Finn Harps was a quality long-range curler into the top corner), but I can’t help feeling the FAI isn’t doing anything near enough to make sure the revenue from their main product, the football itself, is maximized. I will try to make it to an actual league match in the coming weeks to see if they do any better. Pic of website obviously courtesy of http://www.rte.ie/



A QUICKLY-WRITTEN WILLIAMS FAMILY LIMERICK



Said Serena about her sis Venus
“In talent, there’s not much between us
But the source of her powers
Is made clear when she showers
For it’s there you’d see ‘she’ has a _____!”



Too cruel? Well never before have a seen a Wimbledon Centre Court crowd less enthusiastic about a singles champion. Her opponent did herself proud, bravely fighting off the first match point against her, but the lanky American’s power serves were just too good for her on the day. Pic of Venus clutching his her prize courtesy of http://www.bbc.co.uk/



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